Sorry...

...that it's been a while since my last post. You all missed me, I'm sure! Since I've been "gone", I've read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows twice and so have not been able to write anything, in fear that it would be tainted by that wonderful book that seems to have infiltrated even my dreams at the moment. So I haven't got a lot done.

I've been trying to think of a subject for my monologue for the event we are putting on at Sumo bar on (I think) 1st September, but at the minute, I just can't think of anything. I also need to write a monologue for an actor friend of mine, which I might, in exchange for writing it, get her to perform at Ladyfest for me, that is, if I get it done in time.

But I don't want to leave Harry Potter just yet! Still waiting for my Hogwarts letter. Might go and re-read it a third time now.

Dilemma

I received a letter in the post on Saturday morning letting me know that I'd been shortlisted for the Leicester/Leicestershire Short Story contest and was invited to go to some sort of awards do at Borders on 22nd August. This is really cool, and I would be really excited and ranting about what shoes I should wear, etc, except that this is also the date of the one-day writers' residency for Momentum in Nottingham (yes, and my diamond shoes are too tight!).

I can probably make both, if I leave the Momentum day early (which would mean missing Declan's play), though there's no guarentee that I'll make it there on time to the do, and I'd probably be covered in grass and mud and half eaten pork-bears. Alternatively, I could give the do a miss and stay in Nottingham, as I've got a 50% chase of going home without a prize anyway. But it would be good to go and meet some new people, plus I've never been inside the Borders in Fosse Park before. Oh, decisions, decisions!

Facebook

I have just joined Facebook, after months of receiving 'invitation' emails from pretty much everyone I know. It's not that bad. It's not as chav-tastic as My Space is, and the sad state of affairs is that most of my friends will now only communicate through 'The Wall' rather than through more conventional methods such as texting, calling and emailing. I also think it might be a good way to advertise our up-and-coming writers' events, such as Ladyfest and our showcase, so it's not all bad.

I watched the pilot episode of 'My So-Called Life' last night, as I haven't watched it in years and just remembered thinking 'this is my life' in that teen angsty kinda way when I used to watch it. And it's still great, and Jordan Catolano is still goregous. Sigh. Do I constitute as a 'grown up' now? I mean, some woman in a shop told her three year old to 'mind the lady' when passing me the other day, and I hardly ever get id-ed anymore. I don't feel grown-up. Well, sometimes I do, like when I renew my insurance or budget for groceries, but at other times, I still feel about 19. Weird, huh?

Anyway, I have a dance rehearsal tonight, and I can't wait as we're finally doing 'Dance with the Devil'. Hope you're all going to come and watch the show!

Lucy :-)

(picture from http://www.cafepress.com/opheliasart by the way!)

Momentum 2007

Well, I received my letter from TWP in the post today - no feedback yet, but I've got an invitation to go to a one-day residency which will include a 'script slam' so that some of my work can be performed by professional actors. I wonder how many people will be on this one-day residency, as it will affect the length of the extract and amount of time we can spend on our pieces. I'm looking forward to the festival though, although a few of the sessions look similar from last year. I've just got to try to get some time off work now.

With the letter from TWP firmly stashed in my bag, it's time for a re-write of Hoodies, I think. I'm not happy with the Naomi and Jase storyline, and so need to rewrite that definitely. Also, I think it's a little flat at the minute, so need to add some more conflict/points of tension to make it more dramatic. Not really sure what to do though. Perhaps having the bits I think are the 'best' read by pros will shed some more light into what's not working.

I've decided that I'm going to turn my Munitionettes story into a screenplay. The novel never really took off, but I think there's enough there to make a really good TV drama or something. Maybe even a film.

Lara's story is going nowhere at the minute, so I really need to refocus on that. I think I'm going to write the 'real' story first, and then add the magical/fantasy elements later. At least then I can make sure the heart of the story is strong.

Lucy :-)

Potter-Who

OK, so my brain is a little unfocused at the moment. What I mean by ‘unfocused’ is actually ‘consumed by Doctor Who and Harry Potter’. I’m verging on obsession. It was the last episode of Doctor Who series 3 on Saturday, and I can’t wait until Christmas for my next Who instalment! And Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (which I think is a fancy name for Horcruxes) comes out in (at time of typing) 17 days, 8 hours and 7 minutes. I just can’t wait! I’ve decided now that I’m going to go down to Waterstone’s to collect my precious copy of the last Potter book, although I feel guilty as I’ve already pre-ordered it on Amazon and will have to cancel. I’m hoping it will be an Occasion, rather than a few tired shoppers with hyper-active five year old ‘wizards’. Hopefully I won’t embarrass myself by being the only over-twenty-*cough* person there.

So aside from Harry Potter and the ever sexy David Tennant infiltrating my brain, I have also been busy, theatre-wise. Still no news from TWP about the festival, so I’m starting to think I may have dreamt the whole thing. On Saturday I went to Leeds to watch Amanda’s Bollywood Jane and I really enjoyed it. True, the opening scene was very ‘Taste of Honey’, but I think as a whole it was very good, and looked superb. The West Yorkshire Playhouse is a lovely theatre, really spacious. I was very impressed by the two revolves on the stage as well (yes, it doesn’t take much!). It made me sad to think that Leicester right now doesn’t have a theatre of its own, and I am worried that the new one will be this big white elephant. I mean, I’d have rather they spent all that money on filling the inside with state of the art equipment and using the rest of the money for show budgets and hiring directors, etc, rather than making this big façade with glass walls and no backstage area. The Yorkshire Playhouse isn’t pretty on the outside, but it’s functional, and that’s what you want from a theatre. Anyway, perhaps I’ll be wrong and it’ll be the best theatre in the universe once it is finished. Somehow I doubt it though.

Am going to try to write something to submit to Transmission magazine over the next few days, as I’ve just remembered the deadline is next Monday. Oh well. Inter Vivos is still coming along, though I think I’m going to have to change some information as to what Inter Vivos is and how it works as I’ve realised that even in Sci-Fi, some things just don’t wash! But I’m still optimistic, still trying to get the first draft finished before I’m eighty.

That’s about it really. Sorry I’ve not been posting as often as I should – for some reason I’ve been a bit of a hermit recently.

Back

Right, hello, hello! Sorry about the delay in blogging, but I’ve been on a self-imposed exile from work and the internet, and so have not had a chance to post until today. I’m finding it a bit difficult to type at the mo’, due to the fact that my guts feels like I’ve swallowed a helium balloon (damn you IBS!), but I will bravely carry on. :-)
So, I have been a hermit for a whole five days, venturing out only to rehearse (dance rehearsals recently), go to the bottle bank, and buy mobile phone credit.
What have I been doing with myself? Well, I wish I could say that I have finished Inter Vivos, and that it’s already doing the rounds with publishers, agents, etc. but the truth of the matter is that I managed to write about 1,500 words of that, plus some of my children’s novel, and not a lot else. I cleaned, I baked, I became addicted to MTV’s Cribs, I slept, I developed an unhealthy ant-killing obsession (they go pop if you crush them, hee hee!) but that’s about all. I am sorry that I didn’t get more done, but I don’t feel too guilty about it. I didn’t realise how sleep deprived I was until I unset my alarm on the first day of holiday and woke up at 2pm the next day.
Anyway, Inter Vivos is getting there, slowly but surely. I pretty much know what’s happening now, which is good. So now, as always, it’s just a case of writing it!
Still haven’t heard from TWP/Momentum about Hoodies. I already know that I’m not going to be chosen for a reading (my play has too many characters, and I’m not one of their golden favoured few), but some feedback would be appreciated. I already know what I want/need to change in terms of story and characters (namely the Naomi-Jase bits), but another critical eye is always appreciated. They have to let us know soon though, surely, I mean, the festival is in about 6-7 weeks time!

Scared...

Doctor Who on Saturday was extremely scary. So scary, in fact, that later that night, I trapped myself in a psychological prison, backed into the corner of my bedroom, phone in hand, scared that if I couldn’t see all of my room, if I turned my back for a minute, scary stone angels would come in and get me. The mind really does create its own prisons. I’m starting to think that perhaps there’s something wrong with me, I mean, I’m 26, I shouldn’t be getting so frightened by TV programmes that I can’t leave a corner of my bedroom for fear of being eaten by a monster. ‘Active imagination’ is one thing; this is just ridiculous.

I have a bit more written for Inter Vivos, though I’m still nowhere near my target word limit for my first draft (I have about 60,000 words to go!). It’s coming along though. I have a few nice character bits for Cyrus, and Nox isn’t as passive as I first thought she was. I’m still having problems moving my characters from one place to another, but I’m working through it, through gritted teeth a lot of the time. I really want to get this first draft finished now. Once it’s done, then I’m going to celebrate! Want to come? ;-)

Quickie

Just a quick update to say that my short story 'The Dame' has been uploaded to http://www.umbrellastories.com/, so you can read it there. I'm toying with the idea of writing my own detective 'noir' novel, only with my detective of ambiguous gender, made up of short stories that tell a different part of the same case, from different points of view.

I have realised that trying to write a full-length play for the Verity Bargate award from scratch in a month is a tad unrealistic. I am still writing my 'Lara' play (wrote another scene last night on the train) but I'm not going to bust a lung trying to finish it on time. I mean, I'll just be sending something sub-standard to them, and I want to portray myself in the best possible light. So I will continue to write it, and when it's finished, maybe I'll send it to the Soho Theatre anyway.

I also got some good feedback from my friend about the first half of my first draft of Inter Vivos, so that has inspired me to get working again. As always, time is fleeting, and so I write bits and pieces of it when it comes to me, in the hope that one day soon I'll be able to sit down with all these little bits and put them together in some order and create my first draft.

Right, gotta go as have lots to do!

Lara

The main protagonist of my 'fantasy' play is called Lara. I've chosen this name because it sounds a bit like 'la la' as in, a bit crazy. 'Lara' is actually a variant of 'Laura', which means 'Laurel', and apparently St Laura was thrown into a vat of molten lead by some angry Moors. So make of that what you will.

I have just written a plan outlining the scenes I want to write for this play. So far there are 10, and it doesn't end happily. But then, I don't think you can live happily in a fantasy world in the 21st century - a cyber world, fair enough, but not one where your imagination runs riot and goblins leap to your defense and your only friend is imaginery. I have a number of scenes sketched out in my head, and am scheduled to write a few of these in full over the weekend, seeing as I'm not working and have only a singing lesson to distract me (if you don't count Alex!).
I had my first migraine in six years yesterday, though it was a pretty mild one - only my top lip went numb and my hands were funny, but I didn't vom, so that was good. Got to sleep all afternoon, which was great. Then I watched 'Joy Luck Club', and because of the damaged state of my brain I was convinced I was chinese for about an hour before Alex came over to look after me. All better now though, you'll be glad to read, though I'm going to try to take it easy over the weekend too. Meeks gets back on Tuesday and we're all going out, so that gives me something to look forward to.

So, the above-mentioned play is going to be sent of for the Verity Bargate award, and I'm also working on two new stories for a couple of short story competitions. I wrote a chapter of Inter Vivos on Wednesday, so things are all go here. Wish I had more time to dedicate to writing, but that won't happen until at least my credit card and overdraft are paid off, so I'm looking at - five years maybe? So when I'm 31 things should really start cooking...

It's your fault, Guybrush

I admit it, I'm crap with deadlines. I hope no future employer ever reads this, but it's been the same since high school (and no, I'm not being American here, I did actually go to a high school). I always think to myself "oh I won't start that now, I've got plenty of time" only to find myself the night before up shit's creek without a paddle, stressing and crying because I have the impossible task of writing 3,000 words in an hour and making these words into tangible sentences. Sigh. So here I am again, deadline looming, and I have only 440 useable words to my name. It's my own fault for playing 'Curse of Monkey Island' all bank holiday weekend instead of doing any work.

Domestic Goddess

I’m reading a lot at the moment, and it has made my commitment to being a writer even stronger. I want to walk into Waterstones and see my book on the shelf. I want people to like what I write and perhaps even think that it’s good. So I’ve been making a conscious effort to write every day, even if it’s just a paragraph that seems unrelated to any of the stories I’m currently working on. I’m having some trouble with the two short stories I’ve been working on recently, as they don’t seem to be ‘flowing’, and I don’t know whether this is because I’ve not had any time to sit and dedicate to them, as they deserve, or whether it’s because I just don’t have the talent or the stories are uninspiring. Anyway, competition deadlines are looming, so I’d better get my arse into gear and decide one way or the other what I’m going to do.

I’ve also been baking a lot recently, having discovered (yes, I know I’m slow) that you can make most things wheat-free by substituting ‘normal’ flour with wheat-free flour instead. You may laugh at that, but those who know me know that my cooking skills generally amount to opening a jar of ready-made sauce and burning the pasta. So making scones from scratch is a major achievement. And I’ve just found a recipe for carrot cake, and I’m going to try to make bagel soon (they’re a little complicated, but I think I can manage it!). Oh and I’ve found a sausage roll recipe that looks good, when I can afford wheat-free sausage again. If you’ve read this far and are wondering why I’m making such a big fuss about eating everything wheat-free, it’s not some fad diet, but because I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and my digestive system goes into spasm whenever I eat wheat. So I’ve been wheat-free for about 8 months now (not counting that Feast ice cream I ate on Sunday when I thought the biscuit on the outside was nuts). There’s a great website with loads of information and brand-testing of wheat-free food at http://www.wheat-free.org/ So maybe one day, as well as being a literary success, I will also be the wheat-free equivalent of Nigella Lawson. Well, you never know!

Strippers

The new short story I am working on is about a stripper called Honey and her abusive boyfriend, and so right now I'm researching pole dancing and strip clubs. If any of you have ever been to a strip club, please can you give me all the details (or if you wish to remain anonymous, you can email me instead!). I would go myself, but can't afford it. See, this is what Arts Council money should be for! :-)

I have my characters mapped out for my fantasy play (see previous post "Magic"), but in true Lucy-tradition I have yet to write anything since the page of dialogue I wrote in January. But if I stick to my new writing rota, I should be able to work on that tonight.

So, I've created this writing rota, and although it's a little crude it should hopefully keep me motivated and on-track to finishing some of the projects I have ongoing. I was supposed to finish Inter Vivos in April, but that went down the toilet, so my new deadline is a completed first draft by October - that doesn't sound too unreasonable. I also need to begin and finish my fantasy play for the Verity Bargate, so will need a good finished draft by June. At least being too poor to go out anywhere has its advantages.

Tale as old as Time

I love Disney animated films. That's something that most people know about me. My favourite Disney heroine is Ariel, the Little Mermaid. She's feisty, she's independent, she's a little rebellious. However, despite these good qualities, she still feels like she needs to give up her tail (in a painful transformation) to gain legs and barter her voice in order to be desirable to her prince. Putting aside questions of trans-species romance, it got me thinking about how far women will go to try to please a man. Luckily, in Ariel's case, Prince Eric actually fell in love with her voice (I'm going to use this as a metaphor for her mind rather than her singing voice) rather than her looks, and so when she turns back into a fish, he risks his life to save her. Sweet. But not all women are so lucky, hiding their true selves from a man to try to 'make him like me', and then being surprised when the man is not being too happy when his slender sex goddess transforms after 6 months/a year/2 minutes after the wedding into a bloated prude.

And then there's my other favourite Disney film, Beauty and the Beast. Tale as old as time indeed. Girl meets monster, monster learns some etiquette to impress girl, girl falls for him and sets about trying to change him from monster into prince. What if the Beast was just that, a beast who somehow learned how to wield a spoon to eating porridge? I for one went out with my very own 'beast' for a long time, thinking that perhaps I could work a miracle and change his abusiveness and violent tendencies simply because we "loved" each other. Well, love, as great as it is, is not some powerful magic spell, and simply served to give me a temporary (albeit too long) lobotomy, convincing myself that I was happy and could cope with his abuse because one day it would change and it would all be worth it. Belle lost her freedom to the Beast; I lost my self-esteem. And what did I get? A toad. Which I thankfully threw back into the duck pond in disguist.

It's easier to pretend you're someone you're not, or exagerate your good qualities, in order to impress someone who you've only just met. It doesn't hurt so much if someone rejects you in those early stages if you play this game, because you can say to yourself that if they had 'gotten to know you', things would have been different. But if someone isn't pretending, if they really are vile and cruel, don't think you can change them, because you can't. Change has to come from within.

Geekdom

My friends all seem to be having relationship problems at the moment, either breaking up or arguing insanely, and so I'm feeling a bit like Dear Deidre right now, as well as secretly being really pleased that I'm single and don't have to deal with all that bollocks. Other people are weird.

In terms of writing, I haven't written anything since Hoodies was sent off, and I'm really enjoying the break from not having deadlines looming over my head. Going to get back to work over the bank holiday weekend though I think.

Right now, thanks to IcarusGirl, I am listening to Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince on my mp3 player. It's really nice having Stephen Fry reading to me. I can't wait until the last book comes out - I was thinking about having a party to celebrate, but don't have a venue. Have already planned out my weekend when the book is released, so don't expect to hear from me then! I'm such a geek.

(picture of Snape by Laura Freeman, from immeritus.org)

Creative Writing courses create crap novelists

...Or so this article argues. http://www.prospect-magazine.co.uk/article_details.php?id=9276

It has a number of good points. Tragedy does seem to be held in higher regard than comedy, not just in novels, but in playwriting too. The Guardian called some of it's points about religion influencing the bias towards the tragic as 'controversial'. I hate it when people label something as that, when really they mean "I agree with these views but am scared by what my peers might think of me". Stupid Guardian writer. Anyway, it argues that you should write for your peers, not to please academics. And don't write "wangst".

In other news, Hoodies is whizzing it's way over to TWP hopefully as I speak, so with that out of the way, I can concentrate (for a bit anyway) on writing a new short story and beginning my new play. Oh, and my novel. Must not forget about that!

Deadline Looming

Hoodies has to be sitting on Sarah Francoise's desk by 9am Monday morning, and it's just about ready. I want to go over it again another couple of times and make sure I'm happy with it as it is. I would ideally like to turn it into a 'full-length' play, but for now I think this will have to do. We're all meeting up tonight and hopefully the others will give me their thoughts on it, and I can spend tomorrow making any adjustments that are needed. Mouse now opens the play, which I quite like, though I'm not sure if it will stay that way. I also have to pen a letter to TWP explaining why I went over their 'only three characters' quota and beg them to consider my play anyway. Hmm.

I'm itching to get started on my fantasy play. Thanks for everyone's comments on my previous post about it. It seems that everyone is really enthusiastic about it, and I really like it. I've been mulling it over since January, so now I will hopefully be able to dedicate time to write it.

So then, what next? Life after Momentum. There's a weird thought. I've been part of the programme for three years now. Wonder what it'll be like to be deinstitutionalised and working independently for a while? Quite daunting really.

Dissocia

Went to London last night to see Anthony Neilson's 'The Wonderful World of Dissocia', and I really enjoyed it. There were some bits that weren't as good as (in my humble opinion) they could have been (e.g. the actors seemed a bit uncomfortable during the first half, and the singing could have been better), but it was a really good play. The one point I wanted to raise though, is that why is it that when people in plays/films go to fantasy make-believe lands, at the end it's always revealed to be either a dream or that they're mentally ill or they're on drugs? Why can't the fantasy world actually exist? I mean, people didn't know that Australia existed until 1770 (apart from the indigenous people living there). Salman Rushdie wrote a brilliant essay sort of saying the same thing, but I do feel disappointed that these crazy places are always passed off as a hallucination or a cat nap in literature. It's not widely publicised, but Dorothy actually chooses to live in Oz with her Auntie Em in Book 6 of the Oz series, and yet most people take the film's "it was all a dream, and you were there, and you were there" ending as gospel. Just narks me off.

One other thing to note about being at the Royal Court is that all the girls in the building, aside from me, all looked the same. They were all skinny, flat-chested, with dark hair (mainly), all dressed in a manner that they would like you to call 'quirky', and were all talking pretentiously about this play or other (whilst drinking ridiculously small glasses of white wine). It was like the Court has a cloning factory out the back for creating it's staff and audience members. There was one girl in a group of people who was being introduced as a 'writer' to someone else, and she looked exactly the same as well. No wonder I'm perceived to not fit in there.

Magic

I've had a new idea for a play, which I hope I can write in time for the Vertiy Bargate prize, but I probably won't get it done in time. It's a fairy tale about a girl called Lara who lives inside her imagination and who doesn't cope with the real world very well. It sees Lara falling in love, but she is unable to deal with the relationship and ultimately she has to decide whether to stay in her fantasy world or enter reality. I am putting this play on the backburner though, as I've got to finish my Hoodies play first, which, I think will officially be called "Hoodies" from now on, unless I have a sudden flash of inspiration before I post it off.

The picture is by Zindy S. D. Nielsen

The sun is out, but it's still cold

Yes, it is. I feel deceived by mother nature because it is so bright outside, but when I go out, I have to wear my winter coat. Of course, this could just be a phenomenon experienced by me with my abnormally cold blood, but I still feel justified in complaining about it.

Anyway. I should be working on the second draft of my play (deadline 30th April), but instead I am playing the Sims and reading Harry Potter (yes, I have the mental age of a twelve year old). My audition was unsuccessful for the leads of Witches of Eastwick, so at least I don't have that to distract me anymore.

I really want to write some prose again, and I was thinking this morning about getting back to Inter Vivos. One of the things that put me off writing it was that I had to come up with all this science and politics to explain events in my story, but I'm now thinking that if I make it more into a fairy tale, I don't have to worry about the correct procedure for heart transplants, and historical guerilla movements, and I can just make it up. I still want to finish this first NANOWRIMO draft, but then after that I can go back and rewrite most of it again. Also, because I chose to write in first person, it means my feisty heroine isn't in fact feisty; she's more passive because the narrator role has made her the observer rather than the doer. So I plan to fix this too.

I'm having a serious financial crisis, so am having to work at my second job every weekend to try to scrap some cash together, which does not give me a lot of free time to write. Time to hide The Sims 2 disc I think. Right after my pet cat gets a promotion...

B*stards Finally Got Me!

Darn it! This blog is now Beta, after months of underground resistance work. Suppose I knew they'd catch me in the end.

Well, I've started on my second draft for my Hoodies play. Amanda says she likes it, and is going to tell me the details of some people to send it to after Momentum is finished, but Amanda said she liked High Street Aphrodite and that was a bit pants, so I don't know if I can trust her completely.

I've also had another brainwave about Inter Vivos (the novel I started for NANOWRIMO), specifically about the character of the Maiden, who I think is becoming 'me' in a distopian universe. She's this cold, ruthless Amazon-esque warrior woman, but now she has a back-story. So it's all good.

I have realised that I spend most of my time wishing that things were different. But I've just realised that instead of waiting for my Fairy Godmother to pop along (Disney has ruined me), I should actually get off my arse and do something about it! I can't just sit here and wish that my life was better, or that I was doing a job that fulfilled me. I have to actually work at those things and make it happen. I'm so lazy though. Anyway. So I'm coming up with a vague rota to see if I can get my arse into gear.